How to distinguish love from love
- Love is…
- It's just the love?
Finally you meet him! The one and only! Throughout his life (or at least you think so!) You were waiting for someone who will make your heart sing with joy. And now he's there with you, and all your thoughts are occupied only for them - a real handsome prince, even without the white horse. Your relationships are formed perfectly, and everything you perceive it as a couple. Yes, and you are starting to talk about his future.
But very often such promising at firstview relationships are doomed to fail. Why does this happen? Psychologists say that the reason - the inability to distinguish true love from a temporary enthusiasm or, in other words, love. People laid on such a relationship too much hope. In order not to face the disappointment, it is pre-armed with some knowledge.
How do you see your future together? How do you think you will always be together comfortably? Is this the kind of person to whom you are willing to spend my whole life, or you're just afraid to go into the future alone? These issues deserve careful consideration.
Passion that spans lovers dealssuch an emotional "make-up" on their relationship that sometimes even a simple love may seem like a serious sense. How not to be mistaken, walking on thorny paths of love? How to distinguish love from love? To answer these questions, let's first define what is love and love.
It is impossible to give an unambiguous definition of love,because it is - not an exact science. Love - a dynamic process. This means that over time, relationships change, grow and acquire additional shades. Love reveals the best in people personality. It helps in the work and in building a career in family problems and challenges - loving people act as a team, helping and supporting each other, showing understanding and flexibility in the relationship. And this is only the relationship flourish.
The dynamics of love due to the exchange of emotions,trust, deepening relations. The couple turns into a kind of symbiosis - they enjoy the company of each other, trust each other all the secrets that could not be entrusted to anyone else, depend on each other and share with each other care for the education of children and their aging parents for care. They themselves are aging, but aging together.
Of course, and between people who love each otheroccasionally have conflicts, sometimes very serious. It lives and others simply can not be - it's only in fairy tales all always smooth and rosy. And then - the authors of fairy tales do not tell us about family relations heroes, preferring to avoid the phrase "they lived happily ever after and died in one day."
This is perfectly normal - all the people periodicallyquarreling and loving each other is not an exception. The only difference is that the loving couple to successfully overcome all conflict situations - a fortress of their union and warm attitude towards each other quarrel have no effect. Of course, over time, paired relationship undergo some changes. That, however, and of course - it is impossible through life together for 15 years to treat each other the same way as in the first year. Yes, perhaps, adrenaline and passion will be a little less. But if we are talking about real love, they will be replaced by the warmth, care and respect.
But if you live together for a long time, people haveLove that never grew into love, passion will come into place irritation, dissatisfaction with each other, insults, unresolved conflicts, infidelity. Such steam sooner or later cease to exist, and it is - the best option. If you do not love each other people continue to live under one roof, this does not win absolutely nothing.
It's just the love?
So, more or less clearly in love. What is passion? When you are in love and do not love you, too, you are constantly thinking about their beloved, and all of your interests are focused on it. You have made up their own common history; it can be very short, and may continue for quite a long time. Do you like be together, and dream about each other, and at the memory of a loved shivers run you through the body. In short, the picture is exactly the same as in the case of love. Then how to distinguish love from love, if all seems so similar?
Love, of which we are talking,It is a static process, which is characterized by unrealistic expectations of blissful passion without positive growth and development of the relations. There is no such complete trust, lack of loyalty, commitment, there is no such reciprocity.
Enthusiasm does not necessarilyprelude to true love. For example, men become particularly evident, the difference between the love of love - passionate, but who does not love a man often thinks about the subject of his passion only at the meeting, or directly in front of her. All the rest of the time his thoughts are busy with other vital issues. While in loving man almost all the vital issues are resolved for the sake of his beloved.
By the way, on women is generally notextends - in most cases in the period of love heartthrob does not leave thinking young lady. But it does not last too long - a maximum of a couple of months. And after that, all the same pattern - of the man she remembers only before by date.
How else to distinguish love from a simple love? It is unlikely that the above example is enough to understand that you really feel, because everything is very individual. Ask easier than to answer it, but we can look for other answers. Let's try to ask ourselves a question:
- These relationships reveal both all the best in you? In response, try to analyze and evaluate yourself, your partner and your relationship, just be honest with yourself.
- Yes? (Be honest!) When you wake up, you're happy new day, life itself?
- And your parents already know about you and your relationship? You introduced her parents with her boyfriend? And it you acquainted with your parents?
- Are you happy with your current life? Do you feel that your life has become a lot better just because he appeared in it? Do you have any hopes for the future? Whether you are building a joint plan for several years ahead, if you have a common dream?
- You think and plan their business as a couple? You have to give up something for the sake of the relationship, or do you consider the dreams and desires of each other?
- You automatically means that you will spend the weekend together, or do you just expect that the meeting might ever happen?
- You accept each other for what you are? You are not trying to re-educate each other, to change something in one another?
Feel the difference!
After answering all questions, courageously lookfacts in the face. Honest answers will help you understand the difference between the love of love. When you are passionate about, it's possible that your eyes are drawn to this man, and all of your thoughts revolve around him. Perhaps your world has shrunk to the relationship with that person. But! Trying to see your future together, you feel as if the blinders on the eyes. You honestly do not even try to think about your future together. And it says that you are not sure of their relationship.
If you do not see in his beloved noshortcomings, it is certainly understandable. Euphoria also serves blinders on your eyes. But since you are not able to determine if you are willing to put up with its shortcomings, if you are willing to accept him - the usual, everyday, with their zamorochki and cranky. They're there for each of us.
Euphoria will take place sooner or later, and where is the guaranteethat you will not irritate his habits? As soon as the re - everything! End of romance! Many relationships have broken up because of this. And when people love each other - there is no euphoria, which makes them blind. Loving perfectly see disadvantages of each, but love and accept each other just as they are. And do not try to remake - because then it will be a completely different person, not the one who was loved until now!
Euphoria is typical for the periodLove. Many of us have had this experience, especially if you remember the period of our youth. We fell in love in a completely normal boys who then did not seem to us common. In retrospect, it is easier to see and understand their errors. At that time we were not ready to consider routine and even the shortcomings of the object of his secret sighs.
Our thoughts were full of romantic fantasies, andelect attributed to those features, which actually had not been; passion - that's what we felt then. Passion and love. Now that we understand this, we must not repeat the mistakes inherent in youth. Where to start your relationship? You escaped from loneliness? Do you want to feel better than others?
Then there is the real possibility thatToday you give his handpicked features, which in fact it does not have, and your feelings have very little in common with the real object of your passion. All this is more in your head than in reality. Trying to find next to this man escape from the lonely life, you become particularly vulnerable, because your dreams are likely destined to ever fail.
If you love all your dreamscan become a reality. Because they are shared. Give and take, compromise and be in constant co-operation - that is characteristic of love relationship. Achieving common goals, shared values each other determine the dynamics of the relationship of love.
Some of the tips we gave you. And now you will be able to distinguish love from love. Of course, trying to differentiate their relationships require you courage and courage. They also require you to maturity and the ability to take a step back to examine the big picture. As a result, you get more confidence and make a confident step towards love.
Love and be loved!</ P>